One Month Later...

Well, it's been just over a month since we got and subsequently turned down our referral from Russia.  I've had lots of people ask us how we are doing and how much longer it will be so I thought i'd post.

It feels like such a long time ago that we got a referral, it's really hard to believe its only been like 5 or 6 weeks. It's been a hard wait, because patient has never been my strong point.  I was doing quite well waiting, until we got that referral and saw that little girl's picture and realized how badly I want this to happen.  I pray every day that we'll get a referral soon, within the next month, but I know that such timing is not my own...  It's hard to wait when my longing to meet my daughter and to have her home has grown, but we don't really have a choice.

We are making so many plans for this fall:
Next week, September 7th, I finish up my family medicine clerkship. Then, September 22 I take step 2 of my boards, then the 24th (my birthday), I begin my Emergency medicine clerkship.  Sometime about October 20th we manage to move the entire family, plus our temporary babysitter (thanks, Alicia!) and likely the dog across the country to Denver, CO for me to do my subinternship in internal medicine at University of Colorado Hospital.  Then, around November 16th, we again somehow manage to move the entire family across the country to Chapel Hill, NC so I can do a an elective in endocrinology at UNC Hospital.  Then, a month later, we return home to Dayton and it's pretty much Christmas.

So...it's not like we have a tone of time and space to sit around waiting for Russia to call, but still, I long for them to call.  I tell Tim all the time that instead of doing any of the above activities, I'd rather go to Russia. So we'll see. I don't have any control over when they call or what I have to miss.

As far as timing, we really have no idea.  I haven't been given any time frame or any information other than to say that referrals coming out of Russia are "slow."  A passing comment was made to Tim from the adoption agency that she would be surprised if we didn't have a referral by November. But who knows, really. That still seems like a long time away to me, so it doesn't offer much consolation.

I'd say my main emotions are just impatience.  I am also filled with a deep longing that leaves me, at times, feeling empty and sad.  But I am so in love with all 3 of my boys that I am not weighed down by my sadness.  Occasionally we'll be driving or running or cooking and I'll turn to Tim, "Timmy?" "yes?" "I want a referral."  

Please, oh please, Russia.  Call us soon!